I was told I grow too attached to people and things. But since when is that a bad thing? Yes, it hurts when they leave or when they stab you in the back, but our bodies and minds and spirits were created to heal. Maybe we can't regenerate a lost limb or repair something beyond saving, but we heal.
My whole life I moved. My dad chased jobs as a mechanic and was in the military so we went wherever we were told. If I never grew attached to those I did, I wouldn't have been able to cope. I remember feeling sick when I had to leave people behind or when they left me for whatever reasons. I remember crying until it hurt. Despite those sad times, there's nothing I would do to change them. Pain is for a moment, but sometimes it lingers. I hate that I had to leave my friends over and over, and I hate that I don't speak to them because I don't think they'll remember me or because maybe I didn't mean as much to them as they did to me. Instead, I see them on social media, living their lives, and I'm so happy for them. I look at it this way: if I didn't grow attached, I'd be in the opposite position: detached. I'd be alone. Even the guys that broke my heart or that made me feel terrible or that made me feel like I couldn't breathe without them, I wouldn't change our encounters. Everyone who has been in my life has set me on a different path, and I believe it was supposed to be that way. Long story short, I'm glad I grow too attached. I cry during movies and I smile at past friends as they live their lives without me. I wouldn't change a day or a single person that has ever crossed paths with me. I want to grow too attached. Because that's what life is. "You never know what you have until it's gone." "It's better to have loved than lost." We are human. We grow close to things that shouldn't matter or people we don't know. That's what being human is: holding on to what we have now because tomorrow it could be gone.
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K. Weikel"I literally write more books than I can handle." Archives
January 2020
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